Toxic Femininity

Hi, everyone.

Thank you so much for joining me today. I want to share a topic that's been coming up a lot in my life and relationships, which has to do with the toxic feminine energy. We hear a lot about the toxic masculine energy, but what about the feminine?

Toxic, this word can be really overpowering. How do we relate to it?

When it comes to toxic, it really just means a particular energy has gone too far into a domain or situation, that it doesn't belong, but it actually comes from a healthy and natural place.

When we look at toxic masculine energy, this is the masculine energy that wants to rise up to reach for ideas, concepts, visions that are actually beyond our environment.

This masculine energy reaches up to a higher level of consciousness with good intentions to help others. It becomes toxic, though, when it cuts itself from its roots, from the earth, from the feminine. It thinks it has the best idea and it knows what's best without any connection to what's going on around or beneath it. And then it will oppress its idea on other people with no regard for where they're at or where they're coming from. It will disregard the earth, love and the environment entirely.

Okay, so when does the feminine energy become toxic?

Now this really gets back to the Divine Mother, to this Motherly Love, which is so important. When you're a mother and you have children, you're supposed to really love them and nurture them very deeply. A child might be crying. They're in pain, but they don't have the mental or physical capabilities to ease and soothe that pain. So we want to embrace that motherly energy, to hold hem, to nurse them, to rock them, until that pain ceases.

This energy becomes toxic when we apply it not to children, but to adults who do have the mental and emotional and physical capabilities to heal their pain, but we don't empower them to do that.

I was on a ceremony recently where I was going through something very painful. I was in a really dark place, but I knew I had to be there. I knew I had to confront this and move through it. And this was my journey. Now I have this beautiful, wonderful healer friend, who was there and she puther hands on me in this moment as this motherly energy to console me, to comfort me in my pain.

And I just looked at her and I pushed her way and said, ”No, this is my journey! I have to go through this!”

I did this because when you comfort someone in pain, you make them comfortable with the pain, as if they're supposed to accept this level of pain and just be comfortable in it and never grow through it.

When you're comforting them in their pain, you're giving all your energy to them and not to yourself, just as the mother bird, chews the worm and regurgitates all of it for the chicks.

This aspect of comforting someone in their pain is what leads to abusive relationships. If you're making your partner comfortable in their pain they might end up blaming you for that pain and project it back onto you.

And you end up feeling like, “Shit!”

Like, “how the hell did I get in this situation?

I just gave them love and they're giving me pain back.

Why?”

Because there is probably an element of toxic feminine energy, wanting to comfort them and unconsciously keep them in their pain.

So how do we get out of this? You just don't want to step back and see this person you love in pain, right?

Of course not.

We're compassionate human beings with this immense capability to love.

So how do we love someone and not give into the toxic feminine energy?

What we do is we pull back.

We shift the archetypes of the feminine. We switch from divine mother love to the High Priestess. The High Priestess recognizes that she is the womb of the collective, knowing that the pain an individual is experiencing exists within herself. She turns the energy inwards to heal herself in that moment.

So in this ceremony, when I pushed my friend away, she went into this deep meditation and worked with light language to start shifting the energy within herself that I was going through.

We must heal the pain that we're experiencing with whatever spiritual practices or mental health practices that we have available to us, whatever tools are necessary for our own journey.

Then, as we heal, we transmit and allow this aura of healing to move beyond the body. We're in our power, allowing our healing and our power to transcend beyond the physical body into the energetic, astral, and etheric bodies. It spreads out and reaches the people in need who are ready to receive it. This creates a motherly womb of energy, so we don’t have to become the mother ourselves.

Trust that the energy you put out through practice will support the person in need. They are on their masculine journey to push through pain, to ascend, to grow up like the lotus rising out of the muck.

Your energy will support them and they will be lifted up and ascended. There is no guarantee about the timeline, but if you keep doing the work, it will most likely happen in one lifetime or another.

And, you may be surprised. They may get to a place that you're like, oh my gosh, now I need your help. Then the masculine reaches down, lifts the feminine up and you both keep going on this journey of supporting one another to heal and grow.

It is a beautiful gift to be receiving this human experience.

Keep going. Keep growing! Thank you for reading!

Peace and love,

Ben